Poof Poof…Grapefruit… Current Obsession of Today, Yesterday & Tomorrow

Hola Hola Poof Poof I Love you Grapefruit …so much so that I shall take you with me on every one of my adventures…I shall find your home and shake it really hard without hurting it and gather all of you grapefruits and build a huge grapefruit puppy and I’ll call him Ninjafruit…and he’ll be taller than the CN tower…and we will be in the Guinness Book of Records together and the pic will be of me balancing on Ninjafruits head  … and we’ll take walks together and when he pees it’ll create a waterfall of grapefruit juice that will coat people and streets… and while he naps in my backyard I will get more grapefruits and shave off all my hair and glue the grapefruits to my head…and make short shorts out of grapefruits  and match it up with a sunset lightning tank top with shredded fabric and beads made of grapefruit seeds and then we’d go flying and visit all our friends that live on other planets in the universe … We would also have grapefruit juice guns that we would use on enemy ninjas with sharp teeth …we would spray them in the eye and then fly away as fast as we could….then we’d go back home and build a huge fort with a comfy large pullout couch and we’d make one of those beaded curtains made of grapefruit seeds for the doorway and then we’d cut grapefruits in half and bake them in our easy bake oven  and throw them at people that are wearing tee shirts that say I Hate Grapefruits…and they would fall to the ground with their faces covered in the gooey grapefruit goodness and then they would tear off their shirts and stomp on them and burn them and throw them in the air while they are ablaze and run away fast so that it didn’t fall back down on them and burn their faces off….and while Ninjafruit and I are hanging in our grapefruit fort we would hear someone knocking on the seed curtain we made and we would look up and see that it was our suntan lotion delivery guy who only comes around when the sun is down or hiding behind clouds and he looks at my grapefruit short shorts and says “wow! those look juicy” and I say “Yeah o Yeah…?” and he says ” here’s your suntan lotion…” and I say ” thanks …you can put it over there” and he says ” k…” and then he walks over and bends down and then Ninjafruit and I ambush him with grapefruit juice and cinnamon and brown sugar and cayenne pepper and then he’s covered and he spins around and falls to the ground his eyes half open half closed three quarters semi opened….and then Ninjafruit and I watch our daily slot of Magnum PI …then we re-enact it twice…and then we check on suntan lotion delivery guy and I bend over and give him the bestest grapefruit kiss ever and his eyes slowly flutter open and then we both embrace and build a spaceship out of grapefruit skin that’s big enough to fit Ninjafruit and his many baby grapefruit puppies…and we fly off to start our own planet where every night we have to make a bonfire without using fire….xo

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *