Hmmmmm…..If I could be any fruit I’d be a Watermelon….

I want to be a Tiger StormTrooper… like when I take off my helmet you see Tiger…. yeah.

Zebras are AWESOME.

Orange Marmalade is weird and not a good weird like me or you… a bad weird…

I tried seeing with one eye for a while, it takes getting used to… but when I’m drunk I noticed seeing with one eye makes me see better….weird.

One day I want to walk into a store and open up every single bag of pasta on the shelf and string it all together and see how long a store shelf full of bags of pasta is all tied together on one string…

I wish I had a automobile that wasn’t really fully an automobile but more of an elephant that flies without wings kind of like Dumbo but not Dumbo more like a helicopter elephant pelican brontosaurus T – Rex kind of flying elephant automobile….

I like my sunglasses … but I shouldn’t wear them in the dark … while riding my bike… or conducting a train… maybe I should only wear them in the dark if I’m eating potato chips…. feels safer… kind of….

If I had a chicken I would throw paint on her a lot… and I know the chicken might hate it… but I figure if I make popcorn necklaces for the chicken and promise to cater romantic picnics for her and her rooster friend maybe she’d be down….

I’m really into Salami these days….